Planning a Wedding is a Family Affair

The ring is (finally!) on your finger and now it’s time to start planning the wedding. You and your fiancé have some pretty specific ideas of what you want. And your families have ideas of their own.

For Armenian couples, planning a wedding is always a family affair. With large and close-knit extended families, everyone wants to have a say. Midway through the planning process, elopement might begin to sound like a wonderful idea, but you don’t have to feel stuck between making your family happy and having the wedding you want. This week we spoke with Vrej Sarkissian, CEO of L.A. Banquets and Anoush Catering, and got his advice on how to manage the pressures from your family.

Money Matters

If your parents are contributing to wedding expenses, they’ll expect a certain level of decision-making authority. Talk early and often about what you have in mind and how much help you need to minimize major disagreements down the road.

Compromise

Your mom wants a traditional church wedding, but you’re set on an outdoor ceremony. If it’s the religious aspects that are important to her, consider a private church wedding before or after the big day. If you’re not willing to bend on a certain issue, strike a compromise by letting your parents have their way with something else.

Family Dynamics

Wedding planning can exacerbate existing tensions in family dynamics, so be proactive. For example, offer a role to a younger sibling who often feels left out to avoid feelings of jealousy.

Most of all, remember that your wedding is about your family and friends coming together to celebrate your marriage. And the fact they have an opinion on something means they care about your wedding being the best. For your parents, seeing you get married will be one of their proudest moments, and might be the last of your life events that they feel they have a say in. While all the advice and opinions can be frustrating, remember that it comes from a place of love!